Rape of Nanking

Went with one of my friend to watch the show "Nanking" at Cinema Europa recently.

Its more of a documentary more than a movie. It tells us about the sino-china war in China during the late 1970s through the eyes of a few foreigners.

The documentary is produced in a 1st person encounter though some of them are jus reanacting the stories written down on the diary.

For those tat really went thru the "hell" period, I could really feel for them. Thru their sorrowful eyes, you could see the fear and anger and pain that they felt when they saw their loved ones being killed and raped right in front of their eyes.

I still remember one story went like that. The Jap soldiers march into the village and went shooting like mad. One of the man's mother gt caught in the fire zone and was bleeding profusely. However, the mother refused to free her hold on her baby son (the man's younger bro). When the jap saw this, they stab his mother further with their bayonet. The mother lost her grip and dropeed the baby. The baby fell to the ground and screaned. When the jap soldiers saw this, they pierced their bayonet into the baby butt, and flung him away. The man went over to his mum when the soldiers left. His mum's mouth was moving but no words came out. However, the man understood his mum's thoughts. He went to search for his baby bro. He could still recall that the ground was sticky and red as pple's blood flow like a stream down the slope. He finally found his baby bro and hence, carrried him back to his mum. His mum, in order to pacify his bro, pushed her breasts twds the baby for him to suck on. Tearsa jus tickled from her eyes. By and by, the windows of her soul began to draw its curtains and with a nod, his mum was gone just like tat.

The documentary aso shows some clips taken at that time. It was secretly brought out of Nanking and twds the European countries. One clip showed a burnt head. Story was tat the jap poured petrol on the china men and set fire. This man was lucky nt be burnt totally but upon the severe burns on his head, he died shortly after he was sent to the hospital.

Girls as young as 10yrs old was also being raped by the sinful animals. Some of the gals, onced raped, had their abdomens pierced and twisted with a simple bayonet the jap and attached on their rifle. Wat wrong has the innocent girls done to recieve such wrongful treatment?

This documentary really sets me thinking. Like the Sadam Hussein case, like simple office politics... Mishaps happens when pple don see eye to eye or when mens' selfishness arise. The people that really gt injured are often those common pple who have no idea wat's gg on or those who doesnt wan to get involved.

There's a shrine biult right in the heart of Tokoyo to commemorate those who were convicted of crime when the UN steps in. Some Nationalists believe tat the Jap soldiers did no wrong. They were jus fighting for the honour of their Greater Empire. Haha.. How true is tat? Come to think of it, isnt this sentence familiar? Like someone close to you says that he did this things (wrong) becos of other "right" reasons?

Fort hose who have yet to view this docu, I strongly reommmend u to catch hold of this movie. It will not bore u to death, even if u r those who are super dis-interested in history. It sets u awake and pondering........

Xmas Outing 07

Went wif my friends for Xmas celebration... Too bad some of them couldnt make it. But, I found another nice place to eat!! nt a bad choice to go for this outing!!

要开学了！！！ 怎么办？

新的一年又要开始了！ 前几天回到学校，看到这么多老师聚在一起，听到许多的欢笑声（特别是Agnes），觉得好熟悉啊！看到我的桌子干干净净的，十分整齐，心情也舒服多了。当然，不久过后，你会看到我的桌子又好像被许多天灾人祸清洗一空似的。新的这个学年，我的负担也加重了。学校多了一些责任，校外的义工负担也加重了，我也正是进入了新加坡管理大学。2008年真是一个考验我的极限的一年。

看了学生名单，得知我的小五班有一些过动儿，也有一些华文程度不是普通的差的学生，就知道我的考验即将来临。但是，我也没有什么怨言。教书这一份职业就是吃力不讨好的。教书就是需要热忱和耐性的。我觉得去年我对我小四班的程度还算满意。课室管理这方面也还蛮适当的。希望这次，对我的小五班能够得到同样的满足感。

我的小四班是属于程度稍微较好的一班。其实。我也不是很怕学生会问我一些难回答的答案而感到不安。而是，我有点担心从家长那儿来的压力。我不晓得这样的观念是否正确，但我总是觉得程度较好的学生，他们的家长通常会比较紧张孩子们的学业。如有一点差错或孩子的成绩稍微退步，他们就回来找老师。如果是请教或讨论那还无所谓。是那些不先自我检讨而一直指责教师的家长才是恶魔。嗨。。。 希望我不会这么倒霉吧！

我可爱的小二班，我应该怎么办呢？我是你们的班主任，但是我却对班主任的责任毫无头绪。就好像只无头苍蝇乱撞似的。希望我和你们的英文老师不会有Communication Breakdown。 前三天的Orientation Dayz,你们想做什么呢？

其实，我对低年级还蛮抗拒的。因为我觉得他们很“粘”，什么都是“老师，老师”的。也还蛮烦人的。之前，我一直希望我不会再遇到小一或小二生。但人算不如天算，我还是得到我的小二了，还是班主任。（可幸的是我没有小一，不用教汉语拼音。）可能这是天主给我的考验吧！我也得学学怎么应付这群小鬼。想想，有时他们也傻的可爱。

哦！忘了！我还有一班小三的学生。但是，我只教着一班好公民。这是因为沈美清小姐的小一节数有点多，所以她的小三好公民课就有我来代劳。真是风水轮流转。去年，因为前任老师的关系，我的小二好公民是由沈Aunty 来教。现在，换成我来教她的班。

December 2007

Went ti sch for the last 2 days for mtgs..

The first day morning was quite boring. It was mostly of IT stuff and updating of IT knowledge. The first half still ok, teaching us how to use tablet PC. The second half was boring. Teaching us how to use smart board( when most of us alr know). But suprisely, the MT dept teachers (except for some of us, including me) were very "into" it.

The second half of the day was spent in staff mtg. The P went thru with us the whole of the Teachers' Handbook. SiANZ can???? U know how thick the handbook is...

Then, came the most "exciting" part.. Getting to know which class we teach. I am teaching 2 Hope, 4 Charity and 5 Hope. I think 2 and 5 Hope still ok, though i don know how much hope i have in them. I am teaching normal chinese for these two classes so should be ok..

可是，我却教4Charity深广学生！！！怎么可能？ 我只是一个才刚从教育学院长出来的萌芽，为什么会叫我去叫深广呢？ 我不知道其他的同事会怎么想。。。 有些会说我是因为有“靠山”所以才会有“那么好的优待吗？”我知道其实有许多老师在他们心里的最深处，有一个渴望教成绩较优越的一班。有一位老师因为需教一般较差（去年）而落下了眼泪。其实，如果我有的选，我其实并不是很排斥教“较有挑战性”的学生。虽然我对他们还不是称得上是以双手来迎接他们，但我总觉得这些学生还会听我的话吧！其实，越聪明的学生，问题就越多。家长的“回馈”，学生的“高傲”其实是我最怕的两件事。

昨天，我在离开学校之前，还跟同事开玩笑说，以后要好好备课，因为这些学生会比较聪明，问的问题会比较有深度。哈哈。。。 所以，以后就得先把学生会问的问题及答案在脑子里整理好之后才上课，再也不可以混水摸鱼，在一大群的资深的老师里昏昏谔谔地过日子。哈哈。。。

更可悲的是，明年我还是班主任。天啊！我怎么会那么有“潜能”啊？ 给我教深广的学生还不够，还叫我做班主任！他们赢了咯！ 叫一个一天只教他们3-4 节的华文 教师做班主任。如果家长要来与我谈关于他们孩子的事，可叫我如何是好，从何说起？Hmm.. 不对，不对。。。 应该是，不知要说什么， 尤其是那些不在我班的学生。嘿！ 只好与英文老师紧密地合作，互相补助。

风儿传来的消息还让我得知我明年会是"House Master"。 这个责任就是要做很多琐碎的行政工作。我觉得，应该办给那些“那么看得起我”的人一个“感谢”盾牌，让他们有个机会说一说感谢词。

事到如今，也只好至来之者安之。勇敢地扛起这些责任吧！ 不试的话，怎么知道我的伸缩性有多呢？希望我不会让我自己失望，不会让那些支持我的朋友失望。城景，新加坡管理大学！ 我来了！

Trip in Yunan 2004

Today, just happen to see thru my old pic and found this pics taken in China, Yunan.

This trip was indeed unforgettable. It was my virgin trip for Community Service and hence with the collaboration of Youth Expedition Project and Singapore International Foundation, a few of us fr all walks of life (NIE students, Army, Uni Undergraduate, Church goers, aspiring lawyers...) set off to help the less fortunate.

The prep was done sooooo long ago. Mtgs and mtgs nvr seem to end.

I can still remember the long train ride i have to endure from the Yunan capital (Kunming) to another big city (Dali). It was like a overnight ride lor (fr 10 plus @ night till 6plus early nxt morning). After which, have to sit on a few hrs bus ride to the small village.

The 1st Culture shock we gt was the toilet! Hmmm.. No flushing system, no doors... There was once incidewnt whereby i visited the toilet early morning to do my biz when students came in. When they saw us, they even greeted us.. Wah lau... Don know how to reply them lor.

Other than the sec sch students in the village, high sch students also came to us as we org a summer camp for them. This bunch of students are very talented lor.. Some even know how to play erhu.

Another thing to mention is that the trip was in June. However, in the morning when we woke up, it was freezing. I still remember that when my frenz wole me up, i was feeling irritated as I jus wan to snug in my warm slping bag. The temp there was worse than Cambodia's morning tempreature.

Despite the differences we have, both pple from the two countries jell pretty fast. At the end of the trip, after we spent 10 days in the sec sch, we felt very reluactant to leave. All the staff and students were crying. Needless to say, our tear ducts were doing their job pretty well too, i must say. On the bus ride back to the main city, the Principal was cracking a few jokes to make us happier but then... haiz.... Why cant he just shut up ? I know its with gd intention but @ tat time, it will be better if we could jus have a few quiet moments.

The R & R was gd also. I love the hotels that we stayed in during the R & R. Big and very comfortable. Visited a few sceneric spots that i will nvr forget.

I nvr regret gg onto this trip. Though there were some disagreements here and there, even amg ourselves, i did learn quite a number of things there. Seeing the faces of the students there made up for wat ever hard work we endured. I miss them so much that i even back packed alone there a few months ltr. haha. crazy me.

Till now, i still keep in contact with a few (then) high sch students ther via snail mail, email or even via long dist calling. Nvr will I ever forget that this short trip i did in my journey of life...........

Xmas is BACK !!!!

Xmas is cmg again, yeeeaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! Tons and tons of prez are awaiting for me. Also, time to go on a slimming prog for my wallet (not me?)...

Went to Orchard a few wks ago and saw the streets all lit up. Wow, nice. Together with the lights from the cars (yes, yes.. Massive jtraffic jam), the scenery is nt bad. For those who haven went down to take a look, pls do..

Monkeys & More..........

Ever wonder why teachers always call their students monkeys at time? Take a look st the above pic, dear colluegues (pardon my spelling error, cant remember how to spell). Does it remind u of someone u know in sch?

haha... The first pic look a bit R(A) rite? haha.. I was on a hike to BTNR when i saw these at the foot of the hill. Without any hesitation, i took out my trusty cam phone and snap snap away.haha.. Enjoy the moments

Crystal Jade (La Mian)

Long long time ago, went wif Mr A Drain to Suntec City. Totally forgt wat we did there but just remembered that we went to makan at Crystal Jade. The food was so so onli. Looking at the queues at the outlet, i thought the food damn good or soemthing like tat..

Haiz... Disappointing lor. Maybe i set my targets too high. Out of the 3 dishes (as shown in pic), onli the xiao long bao is nice lor. Wat a waste.

JB Food!!!

A few wks ago, together with some of my friends, wen went to Permas Jaya (Msia)for Dinner. Long time nvr mit up liao so wanted to have a good meal.

Its also the 1st time i saw KT's gf... Hahaha.... Kind of unbelievable. KT gt gf.... Wow.... News lehz, haha...

Had a hearty meal there.. We ordered like 6 dishes for 4 pax lor,haha.. I think HX gt a shock when she saw how much we ordered. I don think she dare come out with us anymore, hahha. The first pic is when we are half way thru.

After dinner, decide to take some photo of the strange seafood we saw on the restaruant. hmmm//////

Heard of Turbo Fish?? haha... When i saw the name, i thought its a kind of fish tat can swim superb fast.. Look at 2nd pic. Doesnt look like right? Looks more a bit of like BBQ Stingray, haha.. One thing to take note is that the mouth is loop sided. Soi funny. Its one of the touirst attraction i think.

"Sheng Zhi Dao !!!" is one of the common phrases we can hear in the peroidic drama. But we can also hear it here. 3rd pic. Looks more like bamboo, why call it "sheng zhi" in chn?? Diaozzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Confirmation ! Confirm and Chop!

Actually, the next posting should still be of Cambodia but i haven get the photos yet. So if you wan to know more about Cambodia, wait till i get the photos from my friends first... Be patient. Good things need time to prepare, haha...

A few days ago, i was whining (hmmm.. Do guys whine?) away at how to pass my time during the holidays? Yes yes... I am very contradicting right? During sch days, i was desperate for holidays. Now holidays, suddenly like nothing to do like tat... Thought of various ways to spend my time... Go alone to Sentosa to relac one corner to listen to music, get some sunshine (i am getting whiter and whiter. Can become those steamed chix liao) or somewhere that i can be alone and have some time to myself..

But till then, my days are so packed, haha.. First, str8 after the holidays, i need go back to sch for mtgs and to attend conference elsewhere... Then after which, i spend one wk in Cambodia doing some humanitarian work (love it man!). Finally, one tuesday i decided that i ahve rested enough fr my trip and went to sch to tidy up my stuff (it lloks like all the natural and man-made diasters have happened at my table). Halfway thru my packing, my cousin called and asked me whether can take over his holiday job for a few days while he go overseas. As a servant to the Civil Service , of course i cant moonlight but i onli went to help him mahz... So still can, haha... Of course, gt some monetary rewards in return lar, like 60 per day. Ok lar. THe pay is acceptable thought not a lot. Can pass my time, get some money and at the same time, have a change of working environment.

THe place is in some ulu place near my reservist camp. When i was driving there, i suddenly feel very down. hah... Maybe when i drive past that place, it always to go back camp and hence, the feel. My "help" in that coy is to do data entry. Jus transfer things from hard copy to soft copy in a different format.. Wah lau... So boring lor. Imagine one whole day from 830am to 530pm u r in office typing and typing. How exciting can it be?

I am so happy that i nvr choose an office job. I used to dream bt a 8-5 office job but..... Now, i feel so fortunate that i nvr choose those job. I can nod off to slp even as I am typing lor.I prefer to see the monkeys in my sch than to see words and more words on the computer.At least, there is a new challenge everyday when u r teaching. I cant figure out what is the challenge by doing the same old thing over and over again......

Memories from KINGDOM of CAMBODIA

Long time since i blogged. Months passed by and finally the holidays are here. Though long awaited but suddenly, feel A bit lost...

The highlight for these few mths is actually my trip to Cambodia. This is not the 1st time i went for Service Learning trip. THe other time when i went to Yunan, the sense of achievement and happiness I had with the children down there is beyond words. I went to Cambodia with the aim of achieving the same sense of satisfaction.

25th Nov 2007, I reached Singapore International Airport Terminal 2 with a bit of apprehensiveness. I was afraid that the trip might be dissapointing for me. I might be lucky in Yunan to feel so much of satisfaction and this trip to CAMBODIA might not be what i wanted to find. Nevertheless, I went ahead with the trip, trying to be as "open" as possible. Of course, I couldnt possibly back out on this trip the very last min.

The 1st day was a bit boring. Checked into the hotel and then slack till time for lunch, which was followed by a visit to the Russian Market. What caught my attention there was not the various types of items that were being sold there but the number of beggers on the street. You can see, the age of these beggers are not very old, some i think only a bit older than me. But there they are, trying to earn a living by begging in the streets. Carrying their children on their hips, they just follow u whenever u go, jus in case u decide to pity them and give them some $$$. I was softened to give some money to them but was reminded that if i gave them money, it risk me getting crowded by the other beggers lurking on the streets. Their plight reminded me of something. I once read in a book that poverty is a cycle. How true is that? The children of these beggers have no chance of education and hence, when they grow up, their onli way of survival is to beg on the streets. This cycle will go on and on till someone offers them a helping hand.

The second day was at PKH (Project Khmer Hope)---> First Pic. My team needs to stay there for 4 days. I was a bit excited at meeting the kids, but at the same time, pining for the comfort within the hotel, haha.. When I reached the place, i was in awe. It looks so much like a chalet. haha... Then i found out that this place is actually sponsered by St Andrew's Cathedral in Singapore. No wonder it looks so Singaporean.

After lunch, we proceed with the training of First Aid with them. I was assigned with group 3 (As shown in the second pic). Most of them were in their late teens or early twenties. They can understand basic english and hence, able to understand us though at times, we need the interpreter to help us translate. I realsise that by speaking very slowly, I am able to catch their attention and helped them to understand us better.

I spent 3 full days with this class and by and by, we gt more attached. I started to feel for them and I've gt the chance to visit their "hostels" and get closer to them. As compared to the living standard in Singapore and Yunan, I think they are much more backward. They are just contended living with a roof over their heads while we Singaporeans are complaining abt the heat and the lack of water heater... I remembered one night when i woke up shivering as it was very cold despite the fan being switched off. I slipped right down into my slping bag and suddenly, i remebered the kids. If I can feel so cold, wat abt them? They have no slping bag to slip into. They only have a thin mat with a thin balnket for warmth.

However, these kids nvr complained. They even told me, they feel very lucky and blessed that they are here. There are many other kids who are worse off than them. I nodded in agreement but deep down, I couldnt help but felt amazed by their maturity. I guess a person's living environment could really help a person mature slower or faster.

Third pic-----> Look at their happy faces. They are helping the kitchen to prepare for their dinner. Most Spore kids would turn up their noses at helping to prepare meals while these kids can joke and laugh while preparing for their meals.During one of the prep, I went into the kitchen to see if there are anything I can help. After washing my hands, I helped them to pluck out jackfruits from the skin (If you can understand what i mean). Wah lau.. Ma Lu lor.... The students have to teach me how to pluck out lor. Then, after plucking out, I need to rinse my hands with oil before washing off with soap.I didnt know that b4 hand.

During the 3 and a half days, I was particular close to a few kids. One of them was Mesa (the student in the last pic). I think his family background is one of that which we singaporeans find it hard to imagine. One of his siblings have Aids, two of his siblings have passed away due to Thyoid fever (I guess from his description of the sign and systoms he described). He now only have one bro who is a tutu driver and his mother (60-70 yrs old) is the only other person working in his family. His dad (10 yrs older than the mum) cant work alr. Mesa has been a zoo keeper for 6mths before his mum ask him to come to Kamping Speu to study in this sch. The very last night, I had a chat with me. He told me his problems. I was surprised! He come across me as a happy go lucky person and nvr once did i thought that he have so many things on his mind. He told me that he look happy so taht other pple will not worry abt him. How is this for maturity? I prayed for him that nite and I prayed that he didnt go thru any more of the "proverty sickness".

On the last day, I gave him my slping bag. I told him that it was being used by me before and therefore, was no longer new. He accepted it readily and you can really see the happiness in his eyes. he walked happily back to his hostel and I could see from his back, he was proud to be the new owner of the slping bag. When I started to say my final goodbye, I could see the reluntance in his eyes. Suddenly, he ran up to me and gave me a hug. Boy, was I surprised! I was also trying very hard not to shed any tears and there he was, hugging me. He held on to my hands for as long as possible and listen attentively to whatever i was saying. He gave me his home address and had me promised to write him a letter when i came back to Singapore. Just a few hrs ago before i go on to this blog, I recieved an sms from him. He said that he was not feeling well and was anxious too bcos of his coming exAMS. He also said that he look forward to recieving a letter from me when he go back home in a week's time. Once again, I was touched by his sincerity. I hope that I can still keep in contact with him, just like my other two students in Yunan who are now alr studying in University.

The second student that i find quite interesting is the guy in the second pic, first row, first from the left. When u talk to him, He will hold your hands and touch your fingers one by one. I was quite grossed out initially and then, i realised that is their way of expressing their eagerness and reluntance of letting someone go. On the very last day, he tried to held on to my hands for as long as possible.

Even these events took place about one week ago, the memories are still fresh in my mind. Even as i am typing this out in my blog now, I still feel for them. I am on my bed typing out his blog and they are in their cold hostel room with candles for light studying for their exams. I hoped that these students can study real hard and get a jog in the near future that can improve their lives and BREAK OUT OF THE POVERTY CYCLE.